Do you ever wonder why during sex your mind starts thinking about everything you have to do, need to do or have already done? A lot of people are so distracted, stressed and over committed with the present, future instead of being in the now. Sex is a essential way to how we connect emotionally physically, romantically and spiritually. We need to be able to connect in the now, mindfulness means being present and aware of both ourselves and our surroundings. I don’t know if most people know sex is a great potent stress reliver, great exercise and lots of pleasure. But on the other hand, a lot of people sex can be stressful, painful during sex insecurities, communication issues as well. When you’re worried and preoccupied this can be reflected in the stress response system in the body and when it becomes activated, you will feel difficult feeling aroused or sexual.
Who has ever wondered why their sex life doesn’t seem explosive like you hear? Experts & sexologists talk about this sometime. So, you look and look trying to figure out how to fix or repair the problem. As time passes you may start thinking is it you or your partner. You enjoy being with your partner and think about what issue or issues there could be all in your head or in your own thoughts. When you’re with your significant other and you’re playing around one thing leads to another and you’re in the mist of hoping this will be different then not a damn thing. Why is it not different why not a damn thing well you start thinking about everything that you need to do. Have you ever wondered how to tap into the moment the NOW?
Sexual mindfulness is useful for variety of sexuality issues like sex drive, anorgasmia, desire issues, erectile difficulties, trust issues and rebuilding. Most people that are sexually mindful tend to have better self-esteem, relational wellbeing, and sexual wellbeing, be more satisfied with their relationships and sex lives. Maintaining a satisfying romantic relationship and sex life contributes to physical and mental wellbeing. Mindfulness may contribute to healthy sexual outcomes is that being more aware of the present enables better emotions. People who are mindful in their relationships are generally more satisfied with their relationships and experience less relationship stress. Mindfulness is one of the greatest tools that can help you focus in a world full of chaos and distractions. Mindfulness is part of the therapeutic process which will help to get you back into the moment and the now.
Mindfulness naturally decreases stress and it helps to activate your parasympathetic nervous system once activated your system becomes balanced which makes your stress response Happy and more enjoyable moments. When you focus on everything that’s going on in your life when your having sex, you make it harder than it really is. Focus, mindfulness is not as profound or complicated as it seems. I know you may have heard people say “I’ve had the best sex love making ever”, then you start asking them how and what they are doing or did, they tell you nothing or I don’t know!!!!! Well I know from experience, they probably thought about nothing just enjoying what was going on right then and there IN THE MOMENT OR RIGHT NOW!!!!! I am here to help you learn to encourage, enjoy the moments and the now. Learning to focus on your sensation, senses, what is happening with and in your body and how you are experiencing it. The result is better and possibly complete mind-blowing sex. When you have better sex, you tend to want more, and it becomes a satisfying repeating cycle.
We are so used to doing everything in a half presence that we get to the point that we are on auto pilot making everything fuzzy and less defined. Mindfulness can help open us to the fullness of each moment. Being in the now of the present of mindfulness is being aware and not obsessing about the past or the future, but able to bring yourself completely and all your full attention to the right now in this present moment will help you. Learning how to minimize distractions and getting rid of intrusive thoughts will help you focus your attention on your sensual side. Mindfulness is about paying attention to the here and NOW the present moment especially for intimacy. When your having sex think of nothing else just being into moment looking into his eyes thinking about what you want your partner to do to you. Be in the mindfulness of the NOW meaning sensual, sexually. Learning to practice mindfulness during sex you will be amazed at how much more you will be sexually satisfied, your sex esteem and increasing your desire will be taken to another plane. Women that practice mindfulness get turned on, in touch with their sexual side and sensually much more easily. Mindfulness is not just for the present and the right here and now, but it has the potential to reduce stress, anxiety, ease pain, fatigue, help you make healthier food choices, fight aging and even boost your immunity. These two tools mindfulness and sexual meditation are the greatest for having sex more fulfilling and exciting. Sex can be stressful by itself not to add sexual difficulties compound any problems or issues you maybe on top of everything else. While pain during sex, insecurities, or communication can cause worry and preoccupy your mind this can create a stress response in your system. Once stress response is active it makes it hard to get aroused or feel aroused.
When learning to practice mindfulness or sexual meditation alone or with your partner, there are many ways to get started. To start practicing you first need to find time and a comfortable place to create moments of structured mindfulness or sexual meditation. Start with simple steps like sitting in a quiet place and focus on your breathing and clearing your mind will ensure you can learn to connect with your partner in many ways. Building skills and learning to focus in the moment the NOW and only then will it help you be able to feel every sensation in the bedroom or wherever you’re trying to be sexual. Get with your partner and sit back to back and scan your body mentally and physically to see how your body feels from head to toe, remember to take notes of any parts that make you feel tense or relaxed. While meditating close your eyes to eliminate distraction and concentrate better. During any form of intimacy with your partner it is best to keep your eyes open so you can pick up on all sensual moments, and any sexual situations. This will help you to be able to have a connection with your partner on another level.
Eye contact is a great practice to use to get to a sexual peak. Look into each other’s eyes face to face for about 2 minutes then look into one eye for 2 minutes and don’t talk but you can laugh. That’s okay. Then start kissing with your eyes open, concentrate on the sensations. When you can look at each other inside and outside the bedroom in the midst of the moment of connection things will start to flow better. Then start practicing mindfulness on the little things like showers, eating, walking, driving to get going in these simple exercises. So here we go with getting in touch with your senses in the shower, the noises, the sensation of the water on your skin, the smell, the taste. Focus all your attention on your body, what you feel right now or if you’re driving not what’s in your head. Don’t focus on what you have to do when you get to work or what’s happening once you get there or what you have to say when you get there. Focus on the drive itself, look around you, pay attention to the dew on the grass if it is early or pay attention to the sunset in the evening staying in the moment in the now and enjoying that experience you can dread in the morning drive or get into enjoying it or feel it. If you can do all these tiny little detail 5 minutes everyday it will carry on in your sex life, carry on through everything you do you will start to have less blahs, start to be less depressed and the sun will start to be brighter. That’s when and only when you start to see everything through the rose-colored glasses.